A few nights ago, one of my co-workers/old team mates, Ruben, came to visit me (late at night, I am my own island ten aisles over from anyone else) to talk politics.

He is probably the only one I could have a decent political discussion with at work. It’s not because it’s “inappropriate” to discuss politics (as working opposite hours of Human Resources, we do not stand on rules and proper etiquette), it’s that he’s the only one that works the shift who really follows what goes on. Sometimes it’s so lame because even though, for the most part, we are on the same side of things (left), we always somehow end up debating on really, really moot points. Maybe it’s because he can be a real jerk and I just can’t stand to agree with him sometimes.

I won’t go into how lame this particular discussion was, but it got to a point in the conversation where I just couldn’t keep up with him. I just didn’t know what was going on well enough to be able to argue or refute his point.

I admit that the well of interest in news and politics has almost all but run dry for me over the last few months. I think it started with the lack of results from the midterm elections to stop the Bush administration (and only demonstrated how spineless the Democrats were). Eventually, even Real Time with Bill Maher, The Daily Show and The Colbert Report were getting on my nerves. I couldn’t make it through an entire episode of Bill Moyers Journal without letting my mind wonder. But, the nail in the coffin was when the local Air America affiliate (and my favorite The Stacy Taylor Show) switched formats to sports talk in October. I guess once that happened, I felt defeated.

I admit, I became complacent with the notion that Bush was going to be out of office in so many days. I’m not proud of it.

I really tried to get back into it for the Primaries, and I did up to a certain point (after voting in California and once I personally felt Obama had secured the Democratic nomination). Even if Obama didn’t get the nomination, I still would have voted for Clinton anyway. The enemy of my enemy is my friend.

Since Clinton dropped out, I told myself I wasn’t going to pay attention to the political punditry. I already know where I stand on the issues as well as both candidates. This election is going to get dirty. Or even dirtier, I can already tell.

(And don’t get me started on the media and how they play a role in all of this!)

I used to get so angry/stressed/disappointed sometimes after following what was going on in this country (and the world) and at how “everyone” just seemed to let these things happen.

I still have the hope that things will change (for the better). I really do. Perhaps I do suffer from that “messianic delusion for Obama” Ruben was bitching about (but, for the record I doubt I do).

Eventually I will get back into it. On and off, I still do. I still pop my head up for air, but when I hear crap like Michelle Obama’s “terrorist” fist jab, or Carol Hensley McCain’s plagiarized cookie recipe, I just dunk my head back underwater.

As selfish as it is, I am at a point in my personal life where I really want to keep a positive attitude (and the hope) a little longer.

Ignorance is bliss.

(Happy Fourth, btw.)